Why am I at all surprised?

This past week, I've become very aware of some kind of universal truth. My daughter is so much like me.

Flower Girl

She looks very cute and sweet in this picture. That part of her is not like me. The sarcastic, mouthy part? That's me. This week, I've also learned she's very opinionated. Like me. Why was I even surprised to realize this? I'm opinionated. Her dad's opinionated. Why wouldn't she be? She cries during movies, she's scared of the dark, she wants to defend her brother against bullies with her fists (but she would never actually hit them). She's super sensitive. She's a D-R-A-M-A Q-U-E-E-N. (I'm not exactly sure where she gets that from. Okay, fine...it's me.)

This little girl is so much like me, it's scary. It makes me want to lock her away. It makes me want to shield her from all the stupid shit I did as a kid and young adult. Because if I know anything about myself, I know she's stubborn and she's going to make all her own mistakes, no matter what anyone tells her. I guess mistakes are one way to learn. But to tell the truth, I just want to shield her from that. This is when parenting starts getting really scary. Like Zombie Apocalypse Scary. Broken bones, bruises, cuts and all that from the playground - those things heal. But what you put yourself through, in your relationships with other people, those things change you. They shape you. Right now, I have control over her activities and where she goes and who she sees and I still get to help shape her. But folks, she's still out there every day...learning from others and those things I cannot control. (And no, I don't think i should home school because I do still think she can learn positive things even if she's learning negative things. Also, I am not a patient, organized woman.)

So we're heading into another school year in about a week and she's going into 2nd grade. Things are already getting very different. She's asserting herself more at home, wanting to be her own person (yet, she still doesn't want to sleep alone. go figure). She continues to change and grow every day. This little human who came out of me 7 years ago is becoming her own person. It's scary. I just hope we're giving her the right tools to become a good person.